Now you should have an understanding of what confidence is. Next we’re going to have a look at different ways you can practice and build up your own confidence. Have a look at future quests top tips, try some out, and find which work best for you.

Need a reminder of what confidence is?

Confidence is about feeling sure of yourself and your abilities. Not in an arrogant way, but in a realistic, secure way. Confidence isn't about feeling superior to others. It's that inner knowledge that you're capable. Confidence can help you succeed in many areas of life, from personal to professional. It can help you make decisions based on what you want or need and not just what you’re told. It can encourage you to take opportunities, help others and push yourself to try new things. A lack of confidence can often hold you back or stop you from doing things, even if you really want to.

Tip one - power poses

Power poses are typically associated with positive traits such as confidence, power, and achievement. With your chest lifted, head held high, arms either up or propped on the hips, you're showing off these traits in a positive, non-arrogant way. With this in mind, there are several poses you could strike.

1 – Stand or sit up straight, head held high, hands on your hips, like a superhero.

2 – Arms stretched up to the sky, hands in a fist, looking up, like you’re about to fly.

3 – Stand and sit up straight, hands behind your head, elbows out, looking forward, like you’re relaxed but thoughtful.

Hold one of these poses for a minute or two, and then jot some notes down about how you felt before and after. Now, try holding these poses before an up-and-coming event that may be causing nerves, such as a job interview or a presentation to help give you a boost of confidence. Doing a power pose for just 2 minutes can increase your confidence up to 20%!

For more information on Power Poses please see Amy Cuddy’s Ted Talk.

Tip Two: POSITIVE THINKING

How you see yourself has a huge impact on your own confidence. If you often tell yourself negative things, then you'll eventually start to believe them, and maybe even live by them and allow them to hold you back. In this case, positive thinking can be a very powerful tool for healing and for improving the quality of your life in almost every way.

But the question is, how do you break the habit of a lifetime, and start changing your negative thoughts to positive ones?

First, start to think about some of your most common recurring negative thoughts, write them in the box below or on a piece of paper. Next you’re going to think about how you can reword those into positive ones instead. Write the positive thoughts next to the negative ones.

Here are some examples:

I am not worth anything – I’m a valuable person!

I always make mistakes – I do many things well!

I’m rubbish – I’m a great person!

I don’t deserve a good life – I deserve to be happy and healthy!

I’m stupid – I am smart!

Now, whenever one of your negatives thoughts tries to bring you down, catch yourself, stop, and think of your positive thought instead!

It might take you a while to become comfortable doing this and you might not catch all of the negative thoughts at first, but with time and practice you will start to notice how much your confidence has grown, possibly without you even noticing, and how much more you’ll be doing the things you want to and not letting your lack of confidence stop you.

Remember; always celebrate the small wins and stop beating yourself up!

Tip three - know the things you are good at

Confidence often comes from being knowledgeable or good at things, so write a list of as many things as you can think of that you are good at below – and remember everyone is good at something! They can be small things like, ‘I have neat handwriting’, or big things like, ‘I can speak more than one language’, so don't limit yourself, there are no wrong answers!

In the future, whenever you’re feeling a lack of confidence, try making a list, you can do it in your head if you have nowhere to write it down, of things you are good at, and consider how those things could be helpful to your situation.

Don’t forget, you are the expert in all things you! When making decisions based on your future, you many want to ask for advice or more knowledge around your options but the final decision should come from you, have the confidence to make those decisions about your future!

TIP FOUR - DON'T FEAR FAILURE

Don’t be afraid to fail or be wrong, this is natural and happens to everyone. With that said, you should make sure you own up to it when you do/are, especially to yourself! But remember that it’s okay to get things wrong as long as you can learn from it. No one is perfect.

It's important to realise that in everything we do, there's always a chance that we'll fail. Facing that chance, and embracing it, is not only courageous, it also gives us a fuller, more rewarding life.

Many people experience fear of failure because they fear the unknown. You can remove that fear by considering all of the potential outcomes of your decision. When you have big life changing decisions to make, like what to do after A-Levels for example, it is always advisable to do your research, and then use that research to consider all of the potential outcomes.

Take some time now to think about a situation where you will need to make a big decision, try and consider the following things;

• Worst-case scenario

  The worse-case scenario, in some cases, the worst-case scenario may be genuinely disastrous, and it may be perfectly rational to fear failure. In other cases, however, and more commonly, the worst-case may actually not be that bad, and recognising this can help.

• Best-case scenario

  The best-case scenario, envisioning the best case can be inspiring and will often give you the confidence you need to make decisions.

• Other scenarios

  Other possible scenarios, the number of other possible outcomes can vary depending on the decision you need to make and the situation you are in. It is important to consider these as the changes in other possible scenarios could differ greatly and have a major impact on the decision you make.

Also, if you're afraid of failing at something, keeping a ‘plan B’ in mind can help you feel more confident about your next steps. If it helps, you could even consider plans C, D, E and so on, until you feel confident moving forward.

But whatever happens, try to look at failure as a chance to learn. So, you get something wrong, that’s fine, learn from it, remember for next time, become more knowledgeable about it and increase your confidence.

Tip five - YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

Remember that you’re not alone! Everyone at some time has felt they lack the confidence they needed. Remind yourself of this whenever you feel a lack of confidence instead of putting yourself down! It’s natural and it’s human, but it's also something that can be worked on and improved so don’t let it stop you from doing what you want to do and being who you want to be.

With the tips learnt from this activity, you should be able to plan out how you are going to strengthen your confidence. Think about which tips you think will work best for you, how you are going to implement them into your own life and how you are going to track your progress.